Saturday, May 1, 2010

So Many Unknowns

Grace at 4 1/2 years old weighs only about 27 pounds and can still be lifted and carried with reasonable ease. However, it is becoming more difficult and I defer to Abe to carry her much more than I used to.

This past weekend we went to a birthday party and much like most children's birthday parties, festivals, etc, there was a bounce house. Big hit for the kids and Grace wanted to be right in the middle of it all, as she always does. We have also been to several parties at Pump It Up or similar venues, where Grace wants to climb, slide and jump with her friends. Abe and I always do our best to facilitate this for her but it is starting to become increasingly harder and there are only so many of these things we can do with her.

Today, we had some friends at our house to play and they all wanted to get in the playhouse. Grace wanted to be right there with them. I couldn't get into the house with all the kids, so I did my best to help her through the door and then hung onto her shirt to keep her from falling. I can't believe she didn't and she had so much fun with the others.

How long will we be able to do this? Will she ever be able to do these things herself? What do we do when she is too big for us to carry? What will I tell her when she asks to play with the others and because of her physical limitations, she cannot? I can barely stand to think about it.

You see, Grace is the most outgoing and friendly of my children. Will her personality change? Will she want to hide rather than entice others to talk with her? Will I lose my sweet Grace?


BusyLizzyMom said...

I have these thoughts so often. Lately I do hear Elizabeth saying things about not being able to do what her friends do and it takes a piece of my heart each time. We do our best to ensure Elizabeth keeps up with her peers and thank goodness I am little enough to climb in all those climbers (despite being afraid of heights) but it is exhausting and makes me very conscious of others and what they are thinking.
I see Elizabeth now being silly when a difficult task is being asked of her and I wonder if that is how she will deal with her inabilities.
Like you I am so afraid of the future and what they have in store for them.

Anonymous said...

I was at a party today. same thing...the bouncy house....My daughter is 6, 50 pounds! I still try and help her as much as I can. She has just started to express why is she different from the other kids....she has a "typical" twin sister. I guess as parents we just pray and hope that thier physical disability will not make them saor feel different at some point...

AZ Chapman said...

this is tricky someone would make a killing if they found a way to pump it up with disabled kids in mind '

Rubypat said...

Aged 7, my little one now weighs 28kg, and is too heavy to lift onto slides, swings, etc, and my heart aches for her when we go to a park; she would love to experience all these things, instead she sits in her wheelchair, and I try to give her fun by blowing up balloons for her to release, or fly a kite; not really the same when all you want to do is 'dance' with your friends!